Wednesday, 10 May 2017

The awkward moment when you enter your Third Trimester but haven't bought any baby things yet

Officially the first (and only) baby-related item we own... Oh, and baby!

So, I officially entered the third trimester of pregnancy this week, which means we are now on the home stretch! Part of me feels like I've already been pregnant forever and the days are passing really slowly, but another part is suddenly startled by how time appears to be speeding up as we hurtle towards one of the single most life-changing events we will ever experience.

I joined the 'Mumsnet July 2017 Births' group a little while ago, and have been following and contributing to the thread with great interest ever since; learning a lot and sharing experiences with a diverse group of fellow mamas-to-be. It has been particularly interesting for me to compare my experience of prenatal care in Dubai with the other group members' UK experiences, with some of the biggest differences including the fact that I appear to have a great deal more ultrasound scans than anyone is getting in England, as well as the fact that the whooping cough vaccine is not offered in the UAE whereas it is standard on the NHS, and here in Dubai the GTT (glucose tolerance test for gestational diabetes) is standard for all expectant mothers, but in England it seems to only be offered to those who are considered at a high risk.

I really enjoy my interactions with the other July-due mothers - a group which also includes my expectant cousin! - and we often reassure each other by comparing notes on mutually-endured pregnancy symptoms and indulging in general baby-on-the-way chit chat. However, over recent weeks, reading the thread has started to give me mild anxiety.

I think I am quite literally the most utterly unprepared pregnant woman in the entire group.

It started dawning on me when I realised I was able to contribute less and less to the more prevalent discussions on the thread. Clearly I was the black sheep; the odd-one-out. Everyone else has moved on to sharing photos of their fully-decorated, fully-equipped nursery rooms. Talking about which brand of non-bio detergent they've already used to pre-wash their entire 0-3 months AND 3-6 months collections of babygrows. Reviewing the different baby-carrying systems they've trialled and tested out at their local sling libraries. Suggesting clever storage solutions for the multipacks of nappies they've already purchased. Writing up their lists of what they've already packed in their hospital bags.

I honestly have NO common ground on which to join in with the discussion anymore. I CANNOT relate. At all!!

I don't even know where we will be living when we come back to Dubai at the end of August; let alone how baby's room will be furnished or decorated. I didn't even know you were supposed to pre-wash all baby clothes before they wear them, and, suffice to say, to date we have not purchased a single item of baby clothing. I didn't have a clue that such a thing as a 'sling library' even existed. Clearly I haven't started to stock up on nappies yet - disposable or reusable (and that's a whole other story...). And as for packing my hospital bag...? I DON'T EVEN HAVE A HOSPITAL BAG YET!

We physically do not own a single baby-related item. Not one single thing.

Trying to reassure myself that I wasn't way behind or being too lax in my approach, I convinced myself that all the mothers-to-be in the July group are just superhumanly organised, overly keen, overly cautious, overly prepared, and/or verging on OCD.

But then...not one, not two, but THREE babies were born to mothers in our July-due group. In the same week. In May!!! Thankfully they are all healthy and doing well, despite arriving so early, but it really hammered home to me that all the other women in the group who already have everything ready and set up are in fact not being overzealous with their preparations. They are simply being practical.

Ok, my circumstances are a little different, in that I'm currently in Dubai and will be travelling to London in less than two weeks, due to give birth there in July. So really it doesn't make sense to do any baby-related shopping until we get to London. Inspired by the massively organised mothers-to-be of Mumsnet, I have at least started curating shopping lists of items we'll need to get as soon as we arrive in the UK on the Mothercare and John Lewis apps. But I still can't help feeling a bit naive for the way I've just made the sweeping assumption that I'll carry baby to full term and therefore still have plenty of time between now and then to get everything sorted.

To be fair, I've taken care of the 'big stuff'; the hospital booking for the birth, the placenta encapsulation booking (more on that in a post soon), plus overseeing (from overseas) the renovations of a number of rooms at my mother's home in London, ready to accommodate us all over the summer. But in terms of physical, material, baby-specific items... Nothing whatsoever has been done in that department.

Yesterday, after having another 4D scan to see baby delightfully wiggling around, yawning, smiling and touching his face, the sonographer gifted us a tiny weeny pair of socks along with our CD of images from the scan. So, finally, we do actually own ONE thing for the baby, although we didn't purchase it ourselves! There's still a long way to go towards being ready, but at least it's one small, baby-sized footstep in the right direction...








1 comment:

  1. Don't worry about everybody else being super prepared! If it's any consolation half the prepared people are only reusing the stuff from their first anyway 😁
    Babies really don't need that much *stuff* in the early days anyway, and a lot of people just organise themselves as a way to make the time pass quicker. Xxx

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